Abstract To compare the social support behaviors of violent and nonviolent husbands, we recruited four groups of couples‐violent and distressed (VD); violent/nondistressed (VND); nonviolent/distressed (NVD);and nonviolent/nondistressed (NVND). Two systems were used to code couples’discussions of wives’personal problems. Using the Social Support Interaction Coding System (Bradbury & Pasch, 1994), no violent‐nonviolent group differences emerged; however, as listeners, NVND husbands were the most positive and tended to be the least negative. Using a coding system designed for this study (i.e., Social Support Behavior/Affect Rating System), we confirmed the hypothesis that violent husbands would offer less social support than would nonviolent husbands. Relative to nonviolent men, violent husbands were less positive, more belligerent/domineering, more contemptuous/disgusted, and more upset by the wife's problem. Relative to NVND husbands, violent husbands displayed more anger and tension, VND husbands were more critical of their wives’problem, and VD men were more critical of the possible solutions wives offered. We discuss differences in the two coding systems relevant to the detection of violent‐nonviolent group differences. Across both systems, few group differences in wife behavior emerged, suggesting that husband behavior better differentiates violent from nonviolent couples when wives are discussing personal problems.